i don't want to sudy because i want to nap and i hate that it's wednesday tomorrow, the last day i'll ever see you

As if it's not yet enough, here I go for another bad temper release, along with the recent ramblings of my friends on their blogs. I can't believe we're all thinking 2008's the worst year ever. You guys don't even know how bad my year went. It went by so fast, I didn't even notice. You really don't have ANY idea how I gave up on most things, that I have officially become a silent creeper. Do you even notice the absence of interesting stories in my blog? All I've been doing is talk about movies, music and books because these are basically the things I relied on, to keep my sanity intact. I wept and cried at times, feeling depressed but thank the heavens today, I no longer feel anything. I'm too numb to even think about it.

And yes, I get what you guys are feeling. A suicidal attempt could somehow change the way of things? HAHA. How I wish. But I won't get there because I'm a robot, programmed to live in this life of sucky routines and I have no right to end it, until the master of fate tells me to do so. Indeed, I have no choice but to ride the waves, I don't even care where it'd take me.

But hey, my girls, I'll share you some activity that I do to release some of my congested anger. Write "fuck" on a paper as many times as possible. Write a name beside it even or follow it up with any noun imaginable. You'd be surprised at the delight it might cause you, it might even be orgasmic. (weh?)

Still too depressing, I hate that I can only tell myself how strongly I feel about you, how I see you in my dreams for the past days and how I countlessly think about holding your hand. Fuck life.

Anyway, thanks *Evan for making me feel better: "Go tell him how you feel. I don't think he'd reject you. You're pretty and you're nice." Too bad he's not you and no I won't do that because I won't throw myself at him looking helplessly desperate. Another fuck life on that.

So there, life must go on despite it being crappy. Here's a toast for the worst! Hahahahha.

*Not real name.